Remembering Daddy
My dad was born on December 7th in 1903. He was 2nd youngest of 13 kids and grew up in rural Kansas ... went to school until the age of 13 when the family needed his help to work the farm. He used to tell us stories about his early life ... (like cracking open watermelons & eating the center before feeding the rest to the pigs) ... and wished he could move his family back to Kansas (or Colorado where he lived on another farm with his family as a teenager before moving to California in his twenties). Mom was a 'city gal' who wouldn't hear of it!
He married my mom in May of 1933 (or possibly '34?) in the Dutch Reformed Church. I don't know much about their early years other than that they met through their respective relatives in a 'traditional' manner. Mom's favorite brother who had married a cousin of my dad's introduced them and they fell in love.
My brother was born in October of 1936 ... my sister in March of 1941. Both were extremely ill as infants and required stomach surgery to survive. Each was skinny throughout their lives. I was born in February of 1945 as healthy as they come. They delighted in my 'sturdy chubbiness' and I grew up 'chunky' ... struggling with weight-related issues most of my life until I joined Weight Watchers in my 40s and learned to eat right.
Dad worked long hours as a maintenance electrician in a rubber plant that manufactured battery cases (among other things). It was his job to keep the ‘Banbury machines’ running, and whenever they broke down … the plant called & dad went back to work at all hours. He never complained, and when WE did … he reminded us always that he was fortunate to HAVE a job to bring home a paycheck each week.
We always ate meals together … said grace before … engaged in conversation during … and listened to Dad haltingly read from the Bible afterward. We took turns drying the dishes, but Mom always washed because she didn’t trust us not to break anything in the large sink filled with soapy water.
We played Canasta, Pinochle & board games as a family. Dad enjoyed tossing the baseball, playing ‘catch’ with each of us … and pushed us in the HUGE SWING he constructed in the back yard (so high that Mom would worry & tell him to be careful) but we knew we had to hold on tight and no one ever fell.
He taught me to turn a somersault when I was 3-ish … sang silly songs & told stories in the car when we went as a family for Sunday drives … loved baseball and listened to 2-3 games at a time when he was home … looking through ‘change’ to find missing coins for his ‘collection’ …
Dad was a gentle spirit with a kind heart. He never drew attention to himself, would give you his last dollar if you needed it, always had a joyful twinkle in his eye, shook hands with people as they left church through the side door … telling them he was glad they’d come … making friends we didn’t know about everywhere he went.
After ‘Scratchy’ … our feral cat got into a fight that resulted in half of his face being torn off and there was no money to take the cat to a vet, Dad climbed the tree in the back yard twice daily for weeks to apply antiseptic medicine that undoubtedly saved that cat’s life.
Everyone in Dad’s family lived to a ripe old age … well into their 90s & even over 100. What no one realized when he returned from work covered from head to toe in coal dust looking much as if he was wearing ‘black face’ make-up like Al Jolson was that breathing that coal dust for all those years would result in the wide-spread cancer that killed him in the Bicentennial year … 1976.
As I remember Dad on what would have been his 105th birthday, I offer this ‘quiz’ … suspecting it would produce that wry grin.
Click pie image above for other Slice of Life participants and these links for more of my family memories shared previously at Small Reflections.
Thought for Today
“If you want your children to improve, let them overhear the nice things you say about them to others.” Haim Ginott
17 comments
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December 7, 2008 at 7:30 am
novice101
Despite your dad being dead for thirty two years his memories are still fresh in your mind. That’s nice.
Thanks for dropping by and leaving your thoughts. Unfortunately your link doesn't work so I can't visit YOU in return. Have a lovely day.
Hugs and blessings,
December 7, 2008 at 7:53 am
motivate09
Very beautiful story. Good to know that after so long he is still cherished in your thoughts. The cat, well that just showed that if he can take care of a cat like that I could not imagine how well he took care of his family. Great blog. The thought of the day, being a father of three, sounds brilliant, definitely will try. Thanks
I appreciate your visit & comments here on my fledgling blog. Sadly YOUR link doesn't work either so I'm responding here instead of visiting. Dad was quite special and I have nothing but fond memories of him. As for the quote, I'm delighted to know it spoke to you ... especially since you're a father of three yourself ;--)
Hugs and blessings,
December 7, 2008 at 3:33 pm
SandyCarlson
I enjoyed that immensely. Your dad was quite the person. I am intrigued, humbled, and touched by your story and by the power of love to keep such stories alive and well over time!
December 7, 2008 at 7:02 pm
Raven
What a lovely tribute to your father…. and the warm family life he created for his children. I’m sure he’s watching over you still.
My parents were born December 5th (Mom) and 10th (Dad) 1910. My father died one month shy of his 80th birthday, my mother died three months after him after a long illness. In some ways she died long before.
As for the kitties. I think my girls are more subtle in their intent. They simply want to drive me mad.
December 7, 2008 at 11:26 pm
Mary (MPJ)
What a beautiful tribute to your dad. Thanks for sharing!
December 8, 2008 at 1:31 am
novice101
I would like you to visit, so here is my link :
http://novice101.wordpress.com
Welcome!
December 8, 2008 at 4:03 am
Karen
What a beautiful tribute to your father–he sounds like a wonderful man! It’s too bad he didn’t get to go back–the hard work of the farm was much healthier than the work he DID do. I’m sending him birthday wishes…
I tried to do the quiz (I REALLY want to know if my cats are plotting to kill me), but they wouldn’t give me my results unless I signed up for an online dating service. Somehow, I think Mark might object to that…
Karen
FYI - I took the quiz again to check this out, and as I mentioned in email, you don't need to enter any data or sign up to get your results. There's a tiny box at the bottom right side of the page that says something like 'No thanks. Send me my results' ... and it gives you the HTML code without further ado.
Hugs and blessings,
December 8, 2008 at 7:58 am
happily retired gal
Sandy, Raven, MPJ, and Karen - Thanks to each of you for dropping by and sharing your thoughts on my 'memories of my dad' ... I've responded to each of you in email already, but felt like expressing my gratitude here as well ... especially since an 'automated' post I'd forgotten about scheduling some time ago has pushed this one down in the queue. LOL
Novice101 - Thanks for returning to leave your URL so I could visit in return. I've left a comment there and will return as time permits.
I sincerely appreciate each of your comments more than you know ... and wish you a wonderful week ahead.
Hugs and blessings,
December 8, 2008 at 8:40 am
Joyce T.
Virginia,
I must quickly get dressed and be off to work, but just had to let you know that this is my ‘favorite-est’ post you have done so far!
I will enjoy rereading this reminiscence of yours when I get home!
xoxo
December 8, 2008 at 7:00 pm
Mary
Virginia,
What a beautiful tribute to your father. Thank you so much for inviting me to read it. I may just join Slice of Life after Christmas. Right now, I’m very busy and very far behind.
Thank you for your comments on my holly post. Holly is beautiful and someday I’m going to have those bushes.
Take care and have a wonderful week.
Blessings,
Mary
December 9, 2008 at 7:33 am
Lisa's Chaos
What a nice tribute to your dad! My great-grandmother was born in Kansas Dec 18th 1902. 🙂 Maybe they knew each other. 🙂 I remember stories she told me of riding to Missouri in a covered wagon where she lived the rest of her life. She had four children and her two sons died by age 20, she outlived one of her daughters as well. 😦 She just died in 1996, on my daughter’s 10th birthday. I still miss her so.
December 9, 2008 at 7:38 am
Quietpaths
What a very lovely tribute. It’s a really good idea to write these things down too. I hope you’ll pass it along to others in your family. Canasta is a big game on my Dad’s side too; my aunts love to play.
I took the cat test and I have a 83% chance….
December 12, 2008 at 3:42 pm
yolanda
What a lovely tribute . Thanks for sharing it with us all.
December 12, 2008 at 3:59 pm
happily retired gal
Joyce, Mary, Lisa, Christine and Yolanda - I appreciate each of you visiting and sharing your responses to my memories of Dad. Methinks I've responded in email already to all but Christine & Yertle ... but since I'd responded here to the first visitors, I thought I'd continue, just because.
Hugs and blessings,
December 30, 2008 at 9:09 pm
Mary
Storyteller,
What a beautiful slice of life and tribute to your Dad. My Dad delivered coal much of his life – shoveled it off boxcars into the coal sheds and then onto the trucks and from there down the coal chutes of the customers. It was back breaking work and the coal dust did a number on his lungs. Not having the lung capacity he needed and having a bad heart, he passed away in 1981 at age 65. Thank you for the memories, my friend.
I wish you abundant blessings, love, laughter, the company of good friends and optimum health throughout 2009.
Blessings,
Mary
April 27, 2009 at 7:08 pm
Mary
What a wonderful tribute to your father. He sounds very similar to Dad. He too work in coal and came home looking like he had applied blackface.
Enjoyed reading this. Have a wonderrful week.
Blessings,
Mary
January 5, 2010 at 7:18 pm
Mary
Virginia, this is a very special tribute to your father. My father worked in a coal yard for many years. I well remember him coming home as “black as coal.”
It seems your father was much like my own…a hard worker, a great father and a good friend. Thanks so much for sharing your memories.
Blessings,
Mary